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You are > Home > Putting manners on The Snob
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Thursday, July 29, 2010
Putting manners on The Snob
IT IS with rare delight that we contribute to our exclusive quality readers an example of putting any snob or bore in the world down into the bovine effluent pit.
For libel reasons, there will be a certain amount of camouflage and obfuscation.
Nevertheless, the incident is true in all aspects, recent, and took place in one of our great local libraries in the computer department of quiet scholarship.
A civil actor, producer, director and writer modestly unobserved, was pursuing his researches at the computer third from left recently vacated by Dr. Cosgrave of Monageer.
Let us say this shy intellectual from monastic Taghmon was examining the ramifications of Innocent the Third’s encyclical, ‘In Virtute Salus’.
Enter boar, sorry, bore, and well-connected snob.
No stranger he to the Haughey pile, Gavin O’Reilly, Denis O’Brien, the Provost of Trinity, Her Excellency the President, Conor Cruise O’Brien as well as Gay Byrne on the Hill of Howth, Mandela and the Archbishop of Canterbury.
This silver-haired bore circled the researchers but unfortunately for the Taghmon scholar (everyone is a cunning scholar at something in Taghmon while letting the unwary think they had nothing but prayer on their minds), he pontifically chose to select the computer alongside our hero.
The breaking of a scholar researcher’s concentration is reprehensible; worse, it is damnable. Undeterred, this executivelyrobed, aftershave-lotioned sneer observed the research theme of the indifferentlyclothed Taghmon note-taker.
Without ever being properly introduced, this brazen wretch announced aloud that he had a particular affinity with the manuscripts of Pope Innocent’s reign as had the late Pope John Paul the Second.
He went on. Pope John Paul was one of the few pontiffs who understood the mind of Innocent the Third.
He, the bore, had had a special invitation to the Dominican Convent in Dublin on the occasion of his visit with many world media heads. He had met and spoke with Pope John Paul on that occasion.
While busily carrying on with his notes, the industrious Taghmon man declared, “So did I that night. The Pope asked me if my uncle James was still cutting corn with the binder.”
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